Paying attention to behavior across environments with Delton CooperSep 04, 2023
When I teach my students about the concept of 'reputation', one of the things we talk about is that it's totally fine and normal to act differently in different contexts. We SHOULD act differently at family dinner than in the school cafeteria. It WOULD be a good idea to talk to the principal or our boss differently than we talk to our friends. There's a term for this: It's called 'codeswitching'.
For some of our kids, we sometimes WISH they would act differently in different contexts. We would love for them to be more aware of the concept of codeswitching.
But what about when a kiddo acts SO differently in another context that we are surprised? Or worried? Or even angry?
In this week's podcast/YouTube episode, Delton Cooper and I are talking about our childhood experiences with ADHD at home and at school. Both of us really struggled in one of these environments while we showed up very differently in the other.
We share why it's important to pay attention to how your child acts in different contexts, what that may mean regarding their mental health, and what we believe all kids need in order to be the best version of themselves.
Here's a clip from this episode:
Why is this kid determined to stay in trouble? Why is he determined to defy the simplest of instructions? Simplest of instructions. Just sit down and be quiet, I'm not going to do it. You know, "When you get done reading your book, close your book and, you know, quietly finish your..." I"m not gonna do it. I didn't want to do homework. You know, I didn't want to do... I didn't want to do anything that forced me to to... Comply? Comply. Perfect word. Even to this day, I have, I don't like complying. You know, that still follows me. Because the complying is just, to me and to other kids that have you know, these diagnoses, is that you're not allowing me to be who I am. I'm not a bad person. I'm not threatening you. I'm not disrupting your world at all. But all I want to do is just be who I am. And you're not allowing that. So we're all going to suffer for this. So that was my answer to school. Yeah, that's a really great way to put it. I hadn't really thought about that connection with compliance before.
*We do dive into some heavier topics related to mental health, so please be aware of that before you watch/listen.
Where to find Delton:
FB: Delton Cooper II